


I Think You're Beautiful

by ladeedadaday



Series: Black Friday - Oneshots [3]
Category: Black Friday - Team StarKid
Genre: F/M, Self-Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts, serious talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:34:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24583864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladeedadaday/pseuds/ladeedadaday
Summary: Lex is having a bad day. Talking about it with Ethan helps her out a lot.TW: Suicidal thoughts
Relationships: Lex Foster/Ethan Green
Series: Black Friday - Oneshots [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1777690
Kudos: 10





	I Think You're Beautiful

Lex sighs loudly, flopping down on her and Ethan's shared bed. "What's wrong, love?" He takes her hand and kisses her knuckles before dropping her hand. She gave him no answer. "Baby, please, you gotta talk to me so I can help you." He pushes. 

"I know." Lex whispers, sitting up. "I'm feeling really shitty. About myself." He sits up, too, taking her into his arms. 

"Talk to me." He requests, squeezing her body, to make her feel something that wasn't just hatred. "Why do you feel bad about yourself?" 

She sighs again, trying to find the right words to convey exactly how she was feeling. "I... It's mostly intrusive thoughts. Mostly, they're not bad, it's just when they get bad and the voice won't stop. When I look at myself in the mirror, I always think something like, 'God, I'm so fucking ugly.'" She admits. 

"You're not. I think you're beautiful." Ethan says, kissing her hair. "I know you don't see yourself the way I see you, but if I could get you to understand even a little bit of how I see you... But I would like to hear more, I want know what I can do." 

Lex wraps her arms around Ethan's waist, and leans against his chest. "I feel like I can't do anything that used to be fun to me without the fucking voice telling me I suck at it. But today it's been persistently worse." He places a hand on her back, attempting to convey that he's ready to keep listening if she's ready to talk. "Today, I was just doodling, and the voice was saying stuff like, 'Just kill yourself already,' and 'Why are you so worthless?'" Ethan doesn't like hearing his girlfriend say things like this, especially about herself.

The grit in her voice tells him just how badly she's hurting. "I'm so glad that you came to talk to me about this. I'm always here for you, alright? I know it's hard, but I'm always right here, and it's gonna get better." He promises. 

And she believes him. And then the voice comes back. 'He's wrong. He doesn't even care about you.' 

"It's back." She says. "It's telling me that you don't care about me." 

He shakes his head. "It's wrong. I care about you. I love you. I'm in love with you. I care about you so much more than you know." She can't hold it back anymore. She begins to sob into his chest. "There you go. It's okay, love. You're safe, you're with me, and it's okay to feel this way. You're feeling everything at once, and it's overwhelming you." 

"Please stop talking. It's too much." She requests. He nods and just holds her. After a few minutes, Lex was ready to talk again. "I love you. Thank you for being so good to me."

He grins. "Of course. I'm your boyfriend. It's my job to help you. But whenever you feel like this, just tell me and I'll be there with my list of three thousand reasons why I love you and why you're the best person in the world."

Lex hurts sometimes. And that's okay.


End file.
